2/25/02

Damn the stupid hooves on Skyld. We got caught. Now we have detention.

Apparently we didn't cover our tracks very well. They saw hoofprints and a lot of broken stuff. Ok, so the broken stuff was my fault, but really. They're only doors. If you can make a lightning bomb room you can fix some doors. geez.

I guess those frog creatures are pretty bad news. It was actually pretty lucky that I let... that Velma got out. She stopped some sort of invasion.

So, we have to go this weekend off to some town to deliver a list and bring back some herbs. Sounds like pretty cushy detention. I thought we were going to have to go into the dark forest to look for a wounded unicorn, or polish some trophies or something.

We went back to the dorms and told our friends about the detention. We all decided to leave that night instead of the morning so we could camp out. We like to camp out. It's a good opportunity to get drunk. Too bad Xuxu's so tiny. Gotta find an enlarge potion, or a reduce potion.

So the next morning, we woke up to god awful halfling singing. Some little guy was fishing in the river. Then, his pole bent and then pulled him in.

We all ran toward the bank to help him. Except Xuxu. She just sat there laughing her tiny ass off.

Skyld and I dove in. Shigara and Kayla got onto the pier and started playing with Kayla's rope. At least Kayla wasn't playing with Shigara's rope. Hmmm. Maybe something is going on here that I'm not aware of. Or maybe I 'm aware of something going on here that isn't. What am I talking about?!?!?!!

Things got pretty funny then. I swam out to find the halfling. I kept swimming around and around but I was kicking up dust and couldn't even see myself. Eventually I blundered into him. I pulled him up and handed him to Skyld, who had had some problems swimming out there. I guess it's the hooves.

So, on a whim, I went back under for the fish. I found him pretty quickly by following the line. He was huge, about 4 feet long. I punched him a few times until he stopped moving, and I swam back to the surface with him. I couldn't see Skyld anywhere. I saw some bubbles and swam over. I pulled him up, and saw the halfling already swimming for the shore. While carrying a giant fish, I helped Skyld to swim to the shore. Apparently, Shigara had dived in at some point, becasue he was all wet. Crazy.

We went back to the halfling's house and had some fish for breakfast. Pretty good stuff when you punch it into submission and carry it to shore yourself. That's how we fish in the Frozen Isles, except it's warmer here.

We got going pretty soon after. After a few hours, we got to the town and found the house. We went inside, but it was empty. Nobody seemed home. Except a book that tried to bite me. So, I punched it. I punch things that try and bite me, is that so wrong?

We explored the house for a while, and I found a room with a bat thing in it. Everyone but Skyld was there, I guess he had wandered off somewhere else. The bat thing immediately tried to eat Xuxu. So, guess what. I punched it. I punched it really hard. It flew across the room and didn't move. Everyone was really impressed. Especially Xuxu. There was some guy tied up in there. I asked him if the thing was evil, and he said yes. So I stepped on it's head. It made a really cool squishy noise. The group wasn't as impressed with the squishy noise. They seemed a bit nauseated. Oops.

The guy started talking about moving pokers and a dangerous calzone in the basement. I figured he had been smoking devil weed, but we went to investigate anyway. I did poke the poker with my axe. It jumped at me. Maybe the old guy wasn't so crazy.

We found Skyld in the kitchen. What a surprise. He said there were noises coming from the basement. Hmmm.... Must be the Calzone. We explained about the calzone.

"The pastry?" Skyld asked.

"Yes, the pastry," I replied.

We opened the door and charged in. Holy Shit! There was a giant calzone guy charging back at us. Oh well, let's slice and dice. Xuxu flew in and started casting a spell on it. Wow, Xuxu is crazy. I wonder if she's been smoking devilweed?

Kayla takes a few shots at the thing and the arrows open up some holes in it. Some burning liquid squirts me. Damn! The sauce! So, I didn't punch it. I hacked it with my Great-axe. HA! It squirted me again! Damn this thing.

Skyld did some flip thing and landed on the other side of it. Then, we all kept attacking it until it collapsed into a pile of goo. It didn't taste as good as I thought it would. It kind of melted into an unappetizing pile of soggy goo. Yuk.

Then some lady came home. I guess she's the herbalist and the old man is the cook. We were supposed to give him the list and get some herbs from her. Skyld took care of the list (with a few modification of his own) and Kayla got the herbs. The old lady gave me some potions. Wooohoooo! Potions! I wonder if there are any pleasant side effects? I wonder if any of these are enlarge potions?

So, we're staying the night tonight, and we'll get going home in the morning.

I feel a bit peckish. Does anyone have any pastry?